Suspension
by cjh4ever
Summary: After watching Cyberwoman many months ago, I started writing this story of Ianto's suspension. I decided the story deserved to be posted so here it is. Main characters are Jack and Ianto but the other team members appear too.
1. Week One

_My take on the four weeks (according to the book, Torchwood Archives) Ianto spent on suspension following Cyberwoman. I intend to cover all points of view but focussing on Ianto and Jack._

* * *

**Suspension**

Week One

It was the most difficult decision he had had to make in a long time and it was preying on his mind. What to do with Ianto Jones?

Jack Harkness parked the SUV and walked into the empty Hub. He had dropped Ianto at his flat, only stopping long enough to ensure he was inside and had taken the sedative Owen had prescribed. The boy had been exhausted, dead on his feet and incapable of doing anything other than falling into bed. He would sleep for the next twelve hours and Jack hoped it would help him.

If only there was as simple a solution to his future, thought Jack, hanging up his greatcoat. He glanced through the folder on the top of his in-tray. Toshiko had completed all the immediate tasks in covering up the deaths of Dr Tanizaki and Annie Bennett. Gwen had been round to Jubilee Pizza and administered the Retcon to the manager and other workers and squared the Holiday Inn where Tanizaki had been staying. Owen had dismantled the cyber conversion unit and made all safe in the basement. Jack was pleased with what they had done and put the folder back on the desk.

He looked at the desk's other contents but couldn't settle to any of it, he was still too wired. He dropped into his quarters and changed into an old T-shirt and some torn jeans he kept for dirty jobs then walked to the basement. Inside, the room was much as he remembered it. Owen had moved some of the equipment but the floor was still pooled with blood and the cyberwoman – Jack refused to think of her as human – lay where she had fallen. Owen had put Annie and Tanizaki into cold storage for later disposal but the Cyberwoman would be incinerated along with all the equipment that had kept her alive.

Taking refuge in physical labour, Jack set to and hosed down the floor and walls, washing away the blood in the room. He ran the hose over the Cyberwoman too but only because she was on the floor. Next he went through the room's contents. He piled the equipment to be incinerated on the conversion unit, putting aside only that which was bog-standard stuff that could be safely used again. It was then that he found the photographs of Ianto and the human Lisa and he stopped and looked through them, seeing another side of his colleague. The Ianto he knew had never smiled so broadly or allowed his emotions to show so clearly. He had been closed and withdrawn with Jack and the rest of the team.

And no one had cared, least of all Jack.

The Torchwood leader put the photographs and the other personal possessions – a book, a bottle of perfume, a few knick-knacks – into a box. Maybe Ianto would want them, maybe not, but he would be given the choice. Finally, Jack lifted the Cyberwoman's body onto the unit and balanced it on top of the rest of the equipment. Now he had seen the photographs of her before she had been converted it was harder to regard her only as a metal monster; her humanity was more obvious. He realised that if that was the case for him it must have been doubly so for Ianto. A sobering thought.

Shaking off the feeling, Jack pushed the unit and its contents through the double doors and into the corridor. It was hard work but he welcomed it and viewed the sweat coursing between his shoulder blades and down his chest as a benefit. Luckily the incinerator was on this level so he was able to just push his load along the corridor and round a couple of corners. He was panting hard when he finally got the stuff into position close to the maw of the furnace. He checked the dials and was pleased to see Owen had fired it up as he'd asked; the temperature was almost high enough to melt the cyber equipment but not quite.

Jack left the stuff where it was and went back to the basement. He checked it again, minutely, to make sure nothing had escaped his attention the first time. There were a couple of nuts and bolts which he picked up but nothing more. The room was wet from the soaking he'd given it earlier and would take days to dry out completely. He propped the doors open as he left, to help the drying process. He took the box of mementoes with him and placed them at the bottom of the steps leading to the upper levels.

Back near the incinerator, he checked the temperature again. Seeing it was hot enough, he picked up the Cyberwoman's body and fed it into the heart of the fire. He kept the door open and watched as the flames licked around it and then devoured it. The implants melted too, into a liquid that then evaporated. It was not until all trace of the body had disappeared that he started feeding in the smaller pieces of cyber equipment. He stayed watching as it was consumed, so close to the heat that the skin on his face and chest began to singe but he didn't move. It had to be destroyed and he was determined to watch it.

-ooOoo-

It was the day after the night before, that's how Owen Harper thought of it. He had come in to work knowing what faced him: clearing up the basement after the Cyberwoman had been let loose. He was not looking forward to it.

"Owen, at last," said Jack, standing with arms folded across his chest. "I need your help downstairs."

"What about the others? Why's it always me?"

"Stop whining. I did most of it last night, there's just the unit itself and a couple of heavy items I couldn't lift on my own. It won't take long."

"Oh, okay." Owen dumped his bag by his desk and threw his jacket over the back of the chair. Jack must have worked hard if he'd cleared so much of the basement, probably pushing himself to forget the events of the night. Jack turned to lead the way to the basement and Owen followed. They didn't speak again until they were nearing the incinerator.

"What have you done about the Teaboy?" asked Owen.

"Nothing yet. He's coming in this afternoon to hear my decision."

Jack's answer was curt but he was not as angry as he had been. The few hours since he'd taken Ianto home as well as finding the photos had given him a distance from the events, helped him put them into perspective. He had not forgiven Ianto for the betrayal of himself and the rest of the team but he felt he understood a little more of the boy's reasons. Ianto had loved the woman so deeply that he had laid everything on the line in the vain hope that he could bring her back. Jack believed that Ianto had not understood the threat she posed, to him and to the world in general.

"I know what he did was inexcusable but …. Well, I think I understand why he did it." Owen felt he had to say it, in some weird way he owed it to Ianto.

"You do?"

"Yeah. Look, I was bloody terrified by that thing but he obviously saw it as his girlfriend still. He's so fucked up. Canary Wharf must have done that to him 'cos he was okay before, according to the medical records." Owen had gone over them minutely the previous night, thinking he may have missed something. "He should have a second chance."

"I see." Jack made no further comment as he walked to the incinerator and checked the dials and was pleased to see the temperature was still high. "It's just this to get in." He gestured to the conversion unit and the three pieces of other equipment balanced on it.

The two men worked in silence, hefting the heavy items into the furnace and waiting as each one melted to nothing. Jack stood close to the door again while Owen took refuge further back. When all had been completed, they turned and made for the upper levels.

"I'd like to take a look at the pizza girl, see how the brain transplant was done," said Owen, leading the way up the stairs.

"Okay. But I want the enhancements out of the doctor first. They have to be incinerated too."

"There may be something we could learn from them. Maybe …"

"No! The danger is too great, they go the same way as the rest of it." Jack was adamant and Owen recognised he'd not be able to change his mind. They'd butted heads often enough for them both to recognise one another's limits.

They had reached the main level of the Hub and Owen stopped to look at Jack. "Are they really that dangerous?"

"Yes." Jack carried on to his office. "Put the enhancements on my desk, Owen, all of them."

It was early afternoon. Owen and Toshiko were out following up a Rift spike and Jack and Gwen were in the boardroom sorting out the paperwork for the Cyberwoman Incident, as Gwen called it, and checking all had been covered up adequately. Papers were spread out and they had almost finished when the door alarm sounded. Jack was immediately on his feet and standing at the glass wall looking down. He was expecting Ianto – and there he was.

Gwen stood a few feet from Jack and watched them both. Ianto's hesitant steps into the Hub and Jack's rigid stance, his arms crossed over his chest. They looked at one another and Jack nodded slightly which Ianto mirrored then went on up to the work area. Gwen was not sure how she felt about the night's events. She had been petrified yet she found it hard to blame Ianto. She saw faults on all sides and had told Jack so. Ianto had kept a dangerous Cyberwoman in the basement and put them in danger but she and the others had never tried to get close to him, to know what was going on in his mind or what he was feeling. She knew less about him than every other member of the team, including the enigmatic Jack!

-ooOoo-

Ianto felt odd being back in the Hub. He had been ordered to come and see Jack, to find out his fate. He didn't much care what Jack decided as long as he could stay with Torchwood. It was all he knew and he would lose so much if Jack decided he was a lost cause and Retconned him. Ianto was prepared to endure his punishment for the chance of staying on.

Seeing Jack was in the Boardroom with Gwen, Ianto decided to make himself useful while he was waiting. He picked up a black sack and started clearing away the rubbish. The pizza box gave him a start, thinking back to Annie and what had happened to her. Seemed the rest of the team had no qualms about continuing to use the same place. He was in the medical bay clearing there when Jack appeared.

"Ianto, leave that. Come with me." He walked off and Ianto followed, tidily placing the black sack in a corner. When they were both in the office, Jack pointed to a chair, "Sit down."

Ianto sat down and let his gaze meet Jack's. The two men looked at one another for a moment but then Ianto looked away, dropping his eyes to his hands resting in his lap. Jack was not happy, Ianto could tell from the coldness in his boss's eyes and the set features of his face. The cut and bruised lip reminded Ianto of the punch he'd thrown and of what he'd said. He expected Jack to kick him out.

"Thanks for coming in," began Jack. "We have to decide your future. Have you thought any more about what you want to do?"

"I'd like to stay, if you'll have me." Ianto's voice was soft and Jack had to strain to hear him. "I'm sorry for … everything."

"I see. Why should I let you stay?" Jack had already decided on a suspension. All the others, individually, had come to him and told him to give the boy another chance which had surprised but pleased him. It accorded with his own feelings and spoke well for the future. If they could forgive him now it would be easier to meld him back into the team when the time came.

"I have nothing else," admitted Ianto. "Torchwood is my life. I'll never do anything like this again." He lifted his gaze and met Jack's gaze. "If you let me stay, I'll never go behind your back again." He let his eyes drop back to a scrutiny of his hands.

Jack let the silence grow. "Okay. You can remain a member of Torchwood but you are hereby on suspension. I want you to get your life together again, get over your grief and find a way to face the future."

"Thank you. How long am I suspended for?" Ianto was relieved but anxious. He had no life outside Torchwood and dreaded spending time in his own company with just memories and regrets.

"I don't know. We'll take it a week at a time. When – if – I feel you're ready to return I'll let you know."

Ianto nodded. "I understand. Do you want my ID back?"

"No, you can keep it. You armed?"

"No." Ianto rarely carried a gun, picking one up only when he was required to back up a operation. "Should I go home now?"

"I think that would best." Jack stood and Ianto rose too. "Before you go," said Jack, "I found these, thought you might want to keep them. If not I'll dispose of them for you." He held out the box of photos and other trinkets.

Ianto held out his hands automatically but when he saw the contents he let his hands fall again. "I don't want them. Just get rid of them."

"Okay." Jack put the box down again. "I suggest you get away for a few days. Go and see your mother or sister perhaps." He had read Ianto's personnel file again, going over it with a fine-tooth comb wanting to find out more about the boy. The family details were all there but he could not recall Ianto himself ever having said anything about them or taking time off to visit them.

Ianto looked at him then, caught and held his gaze. The look was challenging as if to say, 'About time you decided to find out more about me'. "I'll think about it," he said eventually and looked away.

"I'll call you next week," said Jack, indicating it was time for Ianto to leave.

Ianto nodded and walked away. He straightened his back and held his head high; he was going to show Jack Harkness and the rest of the team that he had learnt from his mistake and that he could be a valued colleague again. It was not until he had left the Tourist Office that the threatened tears fell. He wiped them away impatiently.

-ooOoo-

Life in the Hub continued. The four remaining team members were kept busy with Weevil sightings and one or two other incursions. They split Ianto's tasks among themselves and got on with them uncomplaining for the most part. Only Owen wondered how it happened that he had ended up with all the dirty jobs. In some ways, they barely missed Ianto. He had been so retiring he had made little mark on their day-to-day lives.

Of them all it was Jack who missed him most. Ianto had been a kind of personal assistant, taking care of the administrative tasks that Jack loathed. While Jack used Gwen and Toshiko for some of these, they didn't have the same attention to detail and needed more careful explanations of what was required; Ianto had just got on with it. Jack also missed his physical presence, the quiet figure in a suit that ghosted through his vision at certain times of the day. It surprised Jack just how much impact Ianto had had on his working life.

One night, when it was quiet and he was alone, Jack took out the box of mementoes that Ianto had rejected. Jack spread the photos out on his desk and looked at them. There was nothing to say where or when then had been taken but Jack thought he could detect a time sequence and rearranged them accordingly. He was looking at a young man who was happy, in love and at ease with himself. That young man had become the Ianto Jack knew but he was almost unrecognisable. The easy smile, the light in the eyes had all but disappeared. And all because of Torchwood One's stupidity in giving the Cybermen and the Daleks a way into this world. Jack carefully put the photos together and placed them in an envelope which he slipped into his desk drawer. The rest could go but he would not destroy these; they would be a reminder of what Ianto had been and what Jack hoped he could be again.

-ooOoo-

Away from Torchwood, Ianto was at a loss. He used his first couple of days of suspension to catch up on sleep and spent his few waking hours watching bad television programmes. He wallowed in self-pity and hurt and spoke to no one. By the fourth day, he had had enough and his natural common sense came to the fore. He spent the whole day cleaning and sorting the flat and packed up and put away all Lisa's remaining possessions and the photograph albums of their holidays. In this way he was able to parcel up the memories of Lisa and what he had done and push them to the back of his mind. He was still aware of them but they did not prey on him so much.

It was on day five that the feelings of betrayal and inadequacy assailed him once more. With nothing to occupy him physically he was left with the memories of Lisa, of Canary Wharf, of his struggle to keep Lisa alive and the results. He was disgusted with how he had acted and he broke down and wept for hours. Later, he looked back on that as the turning point in his recovery. Having accepted responsibility for his actions, he felt able to move forward again. He still hurt, still wanted to hurt in a perverse kind of a way, but he could see the light – however dim - at the end of the tunnel. The next day, recalling Jack's advice, he called his mother and arranged to visit and stay overnight. It was a pleasant trip to Newport and his mother didn't ask too many questions, just made him his favourite foods and cosseted him. He came back feeling better for the time away.


	2. Week Two

**Suspension**

Week Two

Toshiko looked up from her PC to see Jack walking aimlessly towards the stairway leading to the vaults. She wondered what he was planning to do down there. Owen had already fed the prisoners and was back in the medical bay whistling tunelessly as he cut up some alien. Curious, Toshiko used the internal CCTV to follow Jack. He wandered through the tunnels and went lower, beyond the reach of the cameras. There was only one place she could think of down there that he could be going.

Suddenly decisive, she got up and followed him, leaving the diagnostics untended for a while. Wending her way though the tunnels she thought back to the night they'd fought the cyberwoman. She shuddered at the memory, even though she had not experienced the worst of the assault. Recalling the relief she had felt when her colleagues had appeared on the lift also brought back the memory of Ianto punching Jack and the words he had said there and later in the Tourist Office. It would be hard for Jack to forgive those personal insults and yet it appeared he had, at least in part.

Entering the basement, Toshiko saw Jack standing in the middle of the room, hands in his pockets. She hesitated a moment then walked over to him. "Jack? Everything okay?"

He didn't reply immediately still reliving the events of just a week ago. "Yeah," he said finally, drawing out the single word. "I still find it hard to believe, Tosh. How did he keep a Cyberwoman down here and me … us, not know?" He looked at her as if hoping she'd have the answer. "I mean, I live here for God's sake!"

"I don't know," she admitted. "He's very private, never shows what he's feeling … or thinking."

"I should have picked up on it. Watched him more closely."

"Don't blame yourself, Jack. None of us made an effort to get to know him. We all accepted his presence and then ignored him." She smiled wryly. "Even Gwen who was more likely than the rest of us to talk to him."

Jack smiled. "Sad bunch, aren't we? A lot of loners locked in a underground base."

"Not surprising we thought Ianto was one of us then!" They both laughed, grateful to have something to laugh about. "He didn't mean what he said to you," she said, looking at him closely. "About being a monster and .."

"I know what he said," he interrupted. In truth, the words still rang in his brain at quiet moments.

"Sorry."

"It's okay, Tosh, I didn't mean to snap." He smiled over at her. "I just think he may be right." With sudden clarity, he saw himself in the vault upstairs, strapped to a chair while the Victorian Torchwood team had experimented with ways of killing him. They had thought he was a monster. He'd only been allowed to live because they wanted to use his inability to die and his wide knowledge of alien lifeforms.

"Nonsense. What are you going to do about Ianto?" She changed the subject, hoping to get him to snap out of his dark mood. "How much longer is he going to be on suspension?"

"I don't know. What do you think?"

She had been put on the spot and took a moment to think about her response. "I don't think he's a danger to us. I mean, he'd never do anything like that again. He needs to get over Lisa but I think he'd do that better at work than brooding at home, alone."

"How can you be so sure he'll never do it again?" probed Jack. He wished he had her confidence but he had been blind-sided by the boy once and was not prepared to trust again so easily.

"He did it for love, for love of Lisa. That was his one strong emotion, his one tie to life outside Torchwood. From what I know of him, which I admit isn't much, I think he needs us too much to jeopardise his place here again."

Jack nodded slowly. "You may be right. But I can't have him back yet, it's too soon."

"Does he know?"

"No. I'm due to see him sometime today or maybe tomorrow."

"Make it today, Jack. But give him some hope that he will be back here soon." She placed a hand on his arm to reinforce her point. "He needs us and I think we need him."

"Okay, I'll call him."

The two left the basement, now just a dry empty room, and walked back to the upper levels. Toshiko went back to her desk and Jack paused only for a word with Owen before going into his office. There he sat down and got out his mobile, hesitated, then speed dialled Ianto's number.

-ooOoo-

The flat was spotless. Ianto had cleaned it thoroughly once again even though he had been away and not there to make a mess. He stood in the middle of the kitchen with a mug of coffee wondering what to do next. It was the middle of the morning and the day stretched in front of him, empty and lonely. He was surprised when his mobile rang.

He found the phone on the side table where he'd left it, picked it up and saw the name displayed. His breath caught for a moment then he pressed the button and answered the call. "Ianto Jones."

"Ianto, it's Jack."

"Yes, sir." Ianto waited, unsure what was coming next.

"I'd like to meet up, have a chat. How are you fixed?" Jack was sure that the boy would have nothing planned but maybe he would surprise him.

"I'm free all day. Do you want me to come into the Hub, sir?" There was a faint trace of hope in his voice that Jack noticed.

"No. How about we have some lunch?"

Ianto was disappointed. He had wanted to see the Hub again, to see if the others were managing to keep it clean and tidy. But he accepted that Jack wanted somewhere neutral for this first meeting. "Of course. Where?"

"How about I pick you up and we find a pub somewhere?"

"Fine, sir. What time?"

Jack checked his watch; it was almost eleven o'clock. "How about twelve?"

"I'll be ready, sir."

"See you then." Jack ended the call and put the mobile in his pocket. He had an hour, more or less, to decide what to say to the boy.

"Jack, here's the report on that disturbance in Grangetown," said Gwen, appearing in the office. She held out a folder which Jack took automatically.

"Thanks." She smiled and made to leave but he stopped her. "Gwen, got a minute?"

"Sure."

"Shut the door." She raised an eyebrow but did as he asked then took a seat. "I'm going to see Ianto shortly. You haven't said much this past week, about what happened. I wondered if you still felt as you did."

She looked over his head, focussing on nothing, as she thought seriously about the question. "I think so," she began slowly. "He did what he did because he loved the woman. I know that was stupid and reckless and put us in danger but I don't think he understood that. He was blinded by his love. He must have loved her very much."

"And that excuses what he did?"

"No, of course not! It explains it, not excuses it. He has to understand why it was the wrong thing to do before he comes back."

"But he should come back?" Jack pressed.

"Yes," she said slowly, "eventually." She looked at her boss properly. "I won't find it easy to work with him again, I admit that, but he deserves a second chance."

"Okay, thanks."

"How do you feel about him?" She eyed him much as Toshiko had earlier, unsure if would be able to forgive the insults flung at him by Ianto.

"I guess I'm a bit like you. I feel sorry for him and guilty I didn't do more to get to know him, but …" his voice trailed off.

"But he put the base in danger."

"He put the world in danger," responded Jack. "I don't think you, any of you, realise how dangerous it could have been. If that Cyberwoman had got out of here she would have converted every human being on the planet. We'd all have ended up like her."

"She was only one woman …" began Gwen.

"No! That's where you're all wrong. She was a Cyberwoman and all her kind understand is making more like themselves. You saw how unstoppable she was. We didn't stop her in the end. Her love for Ianto stopped her because she left her enhanced body and became human again in Annie Bennett's body. For him! That was the only reason we were able to stop her."

Gwen was silent for a while, digesting the information. She was still not totally convinced that one woman – even a Cyberwoman – could have taken over the world but Jack was and he had met the creatures before, knew what they were capable of better than anyone else. She remembered seeing Jack in the Cyberwoman's grasp, electricity running through his body as she attempted to neutralise the threat he posed, and shuddered. That could have been any of them, could have been Rhys or her family.

"It's a tough one, Jack. Ianto can't come back yet. Another couple of weeks at least, I'd have said."

"I think you may be right. Thanks, Gwen, it's helped to talk about it."

She realised that was her cue to leave and stood up. "Any time." She left the office and went back to her desk, thoughtful.

-ooOoo-

At five to twelve, Ianto was standing at the living room window looking out at the street. He was nervous and fiddled with his tie as he waited. He had showered and shaved carefully then spend a long time deciding what to wear. He had been living in jeans and T-shirts but wanted to look professional, business-like, so had finally opted for a suit and tie. At the back of his mind was the memory of the many comments from Jack about his suits and he hoped that the sight of him wearing one would remind Jack of happier times.

He wondered how this meeting, this lunch, would go. He didn't have high hopes of getting back to work in the next few days, that would be asking too much, but he did hope for some clue about how long he would have to wait. An open-ended suspension was like having a sword hanging over his head and not knowing when it would drop.

The strength of his desire to get back to work, to Torchwood Three, surprised him. He had wormed his way in purely as a means of curing Lisa, never expecting to make a place for himself in the organisation. They had needed him, that was what had drawn him in. They had needed his organisation and method. Gradually he had taken on more duties, glad of the reason for being around the place at all hours and the excuse to be in the more remote parts of the Hub at any time of the day or night. But the work had been interesting in itself. Unlike Torchwood One where everything was state of the art and compartmentalised, Torchwood Three muddled along and everyone had to pitch in their expertise and knowledge. He had therefore learnt about all aspects of the work and despite himself had become interested and involved.

The sight of the SUV in the street below shook him from his thoughts. He straightened his tie once more, squared his shoulders and watched as Jack got out of the vehicle. When Jack looked up, Ianto waved and indicated that he would come down. He checked he had his wallet, mobile and keys and left the flat, running down the three flights to the ground floor. He slowed as he left the building and saw Jack leaning against the SUV waiting for him.

"Ianto," said Jack, straightening up.

"Sir." Ianto closed the gap and stood next to the other man.

"I thought we'd try the _Prince of Wales_," said Jack moving to the driver's side of the vehicle and opening the door.

"Fine." Ianto got into the passenger seat and fastened his seat belt.

Jack started the engine and they were off. The pub he had chosen was on the outskirts of Cardiff, served excellent food and was getting a reputation a good place for business lunches. The proprietor recognised his clients' need for privacy when discussing delicate commercial matters and ensured diners had space, something Jack wanted too. The two men travelled in silence, not having anything to say to one another yet, until they reached the pub and Jack pulled into the car park.

"Okay, time for lunch," announced Jack. He looked across at Ianto and managed a small smile. "Let's go."

The two men entered the pub, walking through to the restaurant at the side. Jack saw the table he wanted towards the back of the room, nice and isolated, and made for it. He draped his greatcoat on one chair while sitting on another. Ianto took the chair opposite, undoing his jacket buttons. Jack picked up one of the menus and looked it over, immediately settling for the steak pie.

"What do you fancy?" he asked Ianto who was looking at another menu. Jack was able to look him over and thought the boy had lost weight and looked paler than normal. But he was clean and well dressed - in one of the suits that always looked good on him - so was looking after himself.

"I'm not sure, I'm not very hungry."

"You have to eat, Ianto. I'm having the steak pie, it's very good."

"Okay, I'll have the same." Ianto folded the menu neatly and put it back in its holder. He had been eating but food didn't interest him; it all tasted the same. Therefore, his meals had been taken at irregular intervals and had been junk for the most part. There was hardly anything in his fridge that wasn't the remains of a takeaway.

"Good. Drink?" Jack was on his feet, ready to place the order and get some drinks.

"Lager, please."

Ianto watched as Jack went off to the bar and waited to be served. It felt wrong to be here with the man, only a week after saying he was looking forward to watching him die. And calling him a monster. Ianto shivered at the memory.

"Cold?" asked Jack, putting glasses on the table and sitting down. He wanted to get know the boy but was unsure how to start. All these little exchanges about food and drink were not going to break the ice and get him to open up.

"No, just … I don't know." Ianto took a sip of the lager. "Thanks."

"Your suspension stands, at least another week." Jack decided to be blunt and to the point. Ianto nodded, expecting nothing less but still disappointed. "What have you been doing?"

"Hanging round the flat. Gave it a good clean. Visited my mother."

"You need to get out, see people. You looking after yourself?" Jack sipped his water. "You look a bit thin." Ianto laughed dryly. "What?"

"You sound like my mother. As I told her, I am eating."

"Make sure you do."

They sat in silence for several minutes, drinking and not looking at one another. Jack gazed out of the window on the pleasant garden while Ianto looked down at the table. This was not going how Jack had hoped. He had expected Ianto to be either antagonistic or apologetic and instead he was withdrawn and silent which, when Jack thought about it more logically, was exactly how he had been before the incident.

"Did you remember to send UNIT the feedback on the new support protocol?" Ianto was looking at Jack, interest in his eyes for the first time. "They wanted it urgently."

"Yeah, Gwen helped with it. Took ages, she doesn't have your knack for filling in forms." Jack smiled. "Nor do I."

"As long as it's gone. They get really uptight if things are late."

"Don't I know it! Remember when we were late with the quarterly updates?" Both men grinned at the memory, a point of contact at last.

The food arrived and they tucked into the meal, both enjoying it. Ianto ate more slowly than Jack but he cleared his plate to Jack's satisfaction. They decided on dessert and had apple pie and ice cream. Talk was minimal as both men struggled to find something to talk about that would not lead to recrimination or confrontation. As a result, nothing helpful to healing the breach between them had been said by the time the meal was finished.

In the SUV, before leaving the car park, Jack turned and faced Ianto. "Look, I just want to say that we don't blame you for what happened. We understand why you did it and we know that we have ignored you, your needs. It won't be easy when you come back, but everyone does want you back."

Ianto nodded, unable to speak for the raw emotion that flooded through him, momentarily easing the pain. He had betrayed these people's friendship and trust and put their lives in danger and yet they were willing to forgive him, to work with him again. He could not believe that they were laying at least part of the blame on themselves. Maybe they didn't know him but how well did he know them? Not at all really. He had not been open with them about more than just Lisa. He wiped at his eyes and sniffed.

"You okay?" asked Jack, surprised at the emotion the boy was showing.

"Yes, yes I am. I … can't believe that you're all so willing to forgive me. I don't deserve it." He wiped his eyes again.

"Ianto, we want to help, all of us. But you are going to have to meet us halfway, no more hiding your feelings and staying on the sidelines all the time."

"I'll try, I really will try, sir." Through tear-filled eyes, Ianto looked at Jack and held his gaze, managing a slight smile.

"Good." Jack put a hand on the boy's shoulder reassuringly. "Now, I'll get you home."


	3. Week Three

**Suspension**

Week Three

Chasing Weevils and heading off some Postykii tourists had kept the depleted Torchwood team busy all day. By nightfall, Gwen had gone off to be with Rhys and to have a quiet night in, watching a DVD and probably falling asleep in front of the television. Owen was still in the Hub, waiting for test results but as soon as they were complete he would be hitting the clubs. He intended to get drunk and find a willing body to warm his bed. Toshiko was busy still, hiding the Postykii incursion and faking some explanation for the mayhem in the city centre.

Jack left his desk and picked up his gun. He didn't want to wear it, that would definitely give the wrong message, but he needed it with him in case he had to respond to an alert. He stuffed it in his pocket. Checking he had his mobile and comms, he put on his greatcoat and walked out of his office. He stopped by the medical bay first. "Owen, need me for anything before I go out?"

"Nah, I'm good. Just waiting for these to finish then I'll be out of here myself. There's a new club opening tonight, Copacabana on Duke Street, should be plenty of young, female flesh on view." He grinned up at Jack. "Want to tag along?"

"It's tempting, Owen, really tempting but I have somewhere to be. See you in the morning. And don't overdo it tonight, or be late tomorrow." Owen made a dismissive noise and went back to the tests.

Jack took the few paces to Toshiko's desk and looked down at her; she was concentrating hard and typing furiously. "Tosh?"

"Umm, just a minute," she murmured, not taking her eyes from the screen or her fingers from the keyboard. "Okay." She stopped and looked round at Jack, smiling.

"I'm off out for a couple of hours. Don't hang around for me, just let me know when you leave and switch the monitor over to remote."

"Will do. Going somewhere nice?"

"I'm not sure." He smiled secretively and ran down the steps and out of the cog door.

Jack got into the SUV and drove, slowly for him, to Ianto's flat. This would be the first time he had seen Ianto since their lunch the previous week. He had called the boy once or twice to check in with him, reasoning that regular contact would keep his spirits up, and had suggested a drink. Ianto had agreed, after a slight hesitation that Jack had not failed to notice. Drawing up outside, Jack stepped out of the vehicle and looked up at the flat but this time Ianto was not looking out for him. Taking the steps two at a time, he sprinted up to the third floor and knocked at the door.

Ianto opened the door smiling faintly, trying to appear normal. He felt awful, the pain and grief had come back with a vengeance a few hours earlier when he had chosen a book to read. Inside it he had found a letter Lisa had written to him, one of the silly notes they had exchanged from time to time. The feelings of loss had overwhelmed him and he had collapsed in a pathetic heap in a fit of crying. He had recovered enough to dress for his drink with Jack but he was not looking forward to the evening.

Jack smiled. "Hi, ready for that drink?" He looked over Ianto's shoulder at the room beyond hoping to be invited in. What he could see was spotlessly clean and tremendously neat, a stark contrast to the state of the Hub where cleaning duties had taken second place to more pressing matters.

"Yes, I'm ready," replied Ianto, standing firm at the door. He liked his privacy and did not want Jack inside. With the control that had seen him through months of concealment at the Hub, he held his emotions in check and smiled through the pain he was feeling.

"Good. Let's go then." Jack led the way downstairs.

Ianto suggested a pub close by so they left the SUV where it was and walked down quiet residential streets to an old-fashioned establishment. It was the place Ianto came to, when he had some leisure time, for a quiet pint and to read a book. No one hassled him or tried to talk to him and there was no irritating piped music. He sometimes would have appreciated a big-screen TV for sports but if he wanted that there were other places to go. The Welshman bought the drinks and the two men settled in a corner. The only other occupants of the bar were two old men playing dominoes, a couple of youngsters who looked barely old enough to be allowed in and a couple, probably married, having one of those silent arguments that only people who have been together a long time can manage.

"Cheers," said Jack. He had a beer even though he disliked the taste; he wanted to fit in with Ianto as much as he could. "What have you been up to?"

"Nothing much. Cleared out the freezer yesterday and restocked it." Ianto was staring into his pint, hands wrapped round the glass.

"Wow, thrilling!" Jack smiled, trying to lighten the atmosphere.

Ianto glared at him, finding the levity unwelcome and intrusive when he felt so down. "What do you want me to do? I lost my girlfriend two weeks ago, forgive me if I don't feel like painting the town red!"

"Fair enough. Sorry." Jack sipped his drink watching the other man. He could recognise pain and hurt, had seen and felt enough of it himself, and saw it now. He wondered what had happened to bring it to the surface.

"No, I'm sorry, sir. I didn't mean to have a go at you." Ianto took a deep breath, trying to restore his composure before this man who held the key to his future.

"What's wrong?" Jack didn't think he'd get an answer but he had learnt some tricks of the trade in his time and he just let the question hang in the air. He could be patient when he had to be.

"I just … I found something that …" Ianto could not continue. His throat was tight and words seemed to get jammed up before they made it to his mouth.

Jack put a hand on the other man's arm and let it rest there. "It's okay." He said nothing more for several seconds as Ianto struggled for control then started on a story, a true one, in a conversational tone. "I found a hat, a green straw thing stuck on a shelf and forgotten until I came along looking for something else and knocked it off. Must have been there, oh, six months or more but the minute it fell down I knew it was his, Pallo's." Jack shook his head and grinned sadly. "I grew up with him and then, just when we were about to set out into the world, he was killed. Was diving for molluscs and started showing off. Hit a hidden rock and his life was over like that." He snapped his fingers. "I thought I'd done all my grieving but finding that hat showed me I hadn't. Couldn't stop crying for hours." Even now Jack felt sad at the loss of a life that had promised so much.

After a little while, Ianto spoke. "That's what it's like. I found a letter," he said softly, suddenly wanting to talk, to share. "We used to write silly notes to one another and it just …" His voice trailed off.

"Yeah. Brings back the pain. The loneliness. The loss of dreams."

Ianto looked at him amazed that he understood. "That's right. I do feel alone and … Well, I always saw my future with Lisa in it and now …" He couldn't finish his sentences; putting his feelings into words just made his situation more painful. He sipped his beer and the two men sat in silence for a moment or two.

"What was she like? Lisa? If you don't want to talk about her, it's okay. But I never met her, it would help me understand if I knew her better." Jack's hand still rested on Ianto's arm, the contact linking them more than just physically.

Starting slowly, and with many pauses, Ianto told Jack about the beautiful, fun loving girl he had met and fallen in love with. From the first sight of her Ianto had been smitten but it had taken him a long time to pluck up the courage to talk to her. When she had responded, had agreed to a date, he had been over the moon. The romance had blossomed and they became an established couple, spending time together, holidaying together and enjoying all life had to offer. Ianto talked on, relating silly stories and the pranks that Lisa had adored and her love of animals.

Jack listened and realised he was seeing the real Ianto Jones at last. The boy before him was animated, fluent and even humorous. His eyes shone with the happy memories and there was a smile on his lips. His intelligence was evident too, reminding Jack that the boy had a good university degree. It seemed a waste to use him on cleaning duties, his mind should be stretched and his intellect challenged. Jack filed away that thought; there were always opportunities in his small organisation to develop talent.

Ianto's voice trailed away. He felt a bit better for having spoken about his lost love but the gnawing ache of loss was still there, in the pit of his stomach. He wondered if it would ever leave him, if he would ever find love again, be happy again.

"She must have loved you a hell of lot," started Jack slowly. He wasn't sure how much to say and was ready to stop at the first sign that Ianto was getting upset. "I know a bit about Cybermen and it's amazing that Lisa was able to fight off the conversion for so long. Only explanation I can come up with is that she didn't want to leave you. That she loved you."

Ianto's head was up and he was staring at Jack. "She tried to kill me," he said forcefully. "Didn't feel like she loved me when she threw me across the Hub!" He looked away from Jack, remembering coming to in the man's arms.

Lisa hadn't tried to killed Ianto, she had killed him. Jack had dragged him from the water and kissed him, giving the boy some of his own life force. Obviously, Ianto didn't remember and Jack was not going to say anything; the fewer people who knew of his inability to die the better.

"But at the end she willingly gave up her enhanced cyber body to be with you."

"And took Annie's instead," commented Ianto bitterly, remembering the dead pizza delivery girl.

"True. But Lisa was fighting to the end - not always succeeding, maybe - but fighting to remain human. I've never heard of that happening before. Says a lot for her strength of character." He took another drink.

"Look, sir, I know you're trying to help but I find it hard to hear you say nice things about her. You killed her." It was out in the open and Ianto felt better for saying it.

"I had to." Jack left it at that. He could have said more, tried to justify himself, but that was not his way.

Ianto looked into his half empty beer glass. In his mind he was back in the Hub with Lisa and the events of that awful night flashed past in a succession of images. His hands tightened round the drink and the knuckles shone white.

"Remember the good times, Ianto," soothed Jack, his hand back on the boy's arm. "Remember all those dates and the holidays, they're what's important."

Gradually the tension in Ianto's body lessened and he released the glass with a little sigh. There had been more good times than bad, years of good memories to outweigh the last couple of months of bad ones. He had to hold onto the good and let go of the bad. "It's so hard," he muttered.

"I know." Jack finished his beer in one swallow. "Let's get out of here." The pub was still almost empty and its lifeless atmosphere was getting to him and certainly not helping Ianto.

Outside the night was dark and still. One or two cars passed as the two men walked slowly back to the SUV but otherwise the place was deserted. The only sound occurred five minutes into the walk when Toshiko called Jack to say she was leaving and switching the alert over to remote. When they reached the SUV Ianto assumed the evening was over and started to say goodbye but Jack stopped him, telling him to get into the vehicle. Used to obeying, Ianto got into the passenger seat and was silent as Jack drove into the city centre, parking on a double yellow line in one of the side streets.

Jack turned to face his passenger, suddenly getting cold feet about his idea but deciding to plough ahead anyway. "I know you don't feel like it, but I want you to come with me and stay for at least an hour. After that you can leave if you like."

Ianto gave him a puzzled look. "Where are we going?"

"You'll see. Is it a deal?"

"I suppose."

Reluctant but curious, Ianto followed Jack as he left the SUV and walked down the street and round a corner. Snaking up the road towards them was a queue of noisy, mainly young people dressed for a night on the town which ended at a brightly lit doorway with an awning over it declaring it to be the Copacabana. Feeling Ianto's hesitation, Jack took his arm and gently kept him walking, past the queue of people to the door. A quick word with the bouncers and Jack, who knew everyone in Cardiff, was propelling Ianto through the door and down the stairs.

"I'm really not in the mood for this," said Ianto trying to pull away without creating a scene.

"An hour, that's all I ask," said Jack, putting an arm round the boy's shoulders. He followed a group of lads into the large darkened space where music was booming out and lights strobed the dancing people. Along the side wall, the long bar was a brightly lit oasis where patrons were standing around in small groups drinking. "This is better. Can't help but forget your troubles here." He was grinning and nodding his head in time to the beat.

At the bar, they got a couple of drinks – lager for Ianto and water for Jack – and stood at a waist-high railing watching the crowd as it ebbed and flowed. Despite himself, Ianto was swaying to the music and relaxing. He hadn't been to a club since returning to Cardiff and had forgotten the infectious excitement generated by a crowd of people all out to enjoy themselves. His tension returned when a hand rested on his shoulder and a familiar voice boomed in his ear.

"Teaboy, good to see ya." Owen was in his pulling gear with gelled hair standing up in a little peak and had a drink in his hand. "Good place, huh? Might last a couple of months at least."

"It's okay." The Welshman was surprised by Owen's friendly overtures, more used to being the butt of his sarcastic humour or to being ignored.

"So, Jack," went on Owen, scanning the crowd, "what do you think of the talent?"

"Not bad. Got your eye on anyone?"

The two men went into a detailed assessment of the female dancers. Ianto tuned them out, preferring to sip his drink and watch the scene before him. A group of four women in their twenties caught his attention. They were dressed alike in short skirts and halter tops that revealed a significant amount of midriff. One of the girls looked up and met Ianto's gaze, smiling at his interest before nudging her friends. In a couple of moments, the girls had left the dance floor and were approaching the men.

"Well, hello girls," said Owen with a wide grin. "The old Owen magic's working, then."

The leader of the girls frowned at him and smiled at Ianto. "I'm Cerys. Wanna dance?" She had him by the arm and was starting to pull towards the dance floor.

"Umm …" Ianto held back, throwing a desperate glance towards Jack.

"Go on, Ianto!" He slapped him on the back and while Ianto was putting down his drink, bent to say to Cerys, "Go gentle with him." Owen was already heading for the dance floor with Abby, one of the other girls, leaving Jack with two attractive blondes. "Hello there, Captain Jack Harkness," he said, grinning broadly and taking one under each arm. "Let's dance."

-ooOoo-

At midnight, Ianto left the club and hailed a cab to take him home. He was alone but content after nearly three hours spent dancing, chatting and drinking. His last evening spent clubbing had been in the week before Canary Wharf - Henry Wentham's stag night – and he had forgotten how much fun it could be. He spent the ride back to his flat humming various songs and chuckling over Owen's peculiar dancing style. The doctor had left with Abby but Jack was still at the club, bopping around with whoever wanted to dance. Ianto was surprised at how much fun Jack and Owen could be in a social situation.

That night, sleep claimed Ianto within minutes of his head hitting the pillow and he didn't wake up for a full eight hours. His first good night's sleep without taking medication. For the rest of that week he still had moments of grief when despair overwhelmed him but they were fewer than before and he began to believe he might come through it intact.

* * *

_Just one more chapter to come. What will make Jack bring Ianto back to the Hub?_


	4. Week Four

_And now we come to the end of Ianto's suspension ..._

__

_

* * *

_

**Suspension**

Week Four

"Damn, damn and damn!" Owen slammed shut the drawer and kicked the cabinet for good measure.

"What's that cabinet ever done to you?" asked Gwen, walking through the lower level tunnels with a box file in her hands.

"Swallowed my file!" The doctor glared at her, frustrated as well as tired. He'd pulled a double shift and still wasn't finished. Autopsies were stacking up as Owen tried to complete the paperwork that went with them. His task, and his temper, was not helped when essential files on similar cases went missing.

"What are you looking for?" She placed her box file on the side with the others and went to Owen's side. He was glowering at her but there was still a tingle of attraction in the air between them.

He explained and she opened a different drawer in the neighbouring cabinet. As her fingers flicked through the files he moved closer, a hand straying to her hip clad in tight black trousers. Their attraction had been growing over the past few days. He liked strong women and was enjoying the chase while she found his interest flattering as her relationship with Rhys grew stale. When Gwen did not repulse him, Owen grew bolder and both hands found their way around her waist then up to her breasts, his hips pressed against her firm bum.

"Am I interrupting something?"

Shocked back to her surroundings, Gwen started and pushed Owen away from her. She was too new in the job to want her boss to see her in a compromising position. "Just looking for a file," she said, remaining at the cabinet with her face averted.

"And not bloody finding it!" retorted Owen. He was unconcerned at being seen with his hands on the new girl and exchanged a knowing look with Jack who was standing with arms crossed looking at them.

"You too?" sighed Jack, deciding to leave the pair of them to their own devices. Owen was bound to hit on Gwen and it was up to her to decide what to do about it. She was a big girl. "I've been looking for the Grupeekii file. Either of you got it?"

"Nope. I can't finish these autopsies if I can't find the earlier files," went on Owen, "so you'd better sort something. And soon." With that he stalked off, hands in the pockets of his lab coat.

Gwen sighed, sliding the drawer closed and finally turning to face Jack. She met his gaze and hoped she did not look as guilty as she felt. "He's right."

"I know. There's only one solution …" There was only one person Jack knew who could find the missing files.

"Hasn't it been long enough? It's almost a month."

"But are you, and the others, ready for him to come back?"

"Whenever he comes it'll be a bit weird, but we need him." With that, she walked past him and along the tunnel disappearing from sight round a corner.

Deciding not to delay, Jack pulled out his mobile and speed dialled Ianto's number. He was surprised when it went immediately to voice mail and checked the time – only 19.40, the boy should be available to answer. When the short message finished and he heard the penetrating beep, he said, "Ianto, it's Jack. Call me. Soon as you can." He returned the mobile to his pocket and looked round at the serried ranks of filing cabinets. His heart sank as he opened a drawer; he was never going to find the file. He wondered where Ianto was and determined to check on him if he didn't call back soon.

-ooOoo-

Halfway through the fourth week of his suspension, Ianto was beginning to enjoy his time off. He had done the necessary things - caught up on sleep, cleaned his flat and visited his mother – and now he was driving along the coast road on his way back from Barry after an evening of pure fun with David and Mica, his nephew and niece.

It had been arranged the previous day when Ianto had visited his sister, Rhiannon, and been persuaded to take the kids off her hands for a few hours. He hadn't minded and that day had picked them up from school and headed off to the seaside. Luckily it was a sunny afternoon and evening, quite warm for Wales too, and they'd been able to explore rock pools, play ball and even paddle in the chilly sea before having fish and chips in the restaurant. When the breeze picked up, and as a special treat, they had headed for the amusement arcade where five year old Mica had trebled the £10 stake her uncle had supplied. Her elder brother, on the other hand, had lost all of his initial stake and had to be given more to prevent tantrums. Now they were dozing in the back seat, tired after a long day of school and fun.

Ianto had enjoyed spending time on his own with the kids and was smiling as he listened to the radio. Even when he found himself thinking of Lisa and how much she would have enjoyed the outing his smile stayed in place. He missed her like crazy and expected he would for a long time to come, and he hated the loss of the future they had planned together, but he could bear it more easily now. It was almost as if his grief – and guilt for what he had done to his colleagues - had found natural boundaries and could no longer spread out to engulf the rest of his life. Ianto was enough of a realist to expect more bad days but at present he felt he could cope with even these.

After dropping the kids off and having a coffee and a chat with Rhiannon and Johnny, it was late and dark when Ianto drove along familiar roads to his flat. He was looking out for a parking space when he spotted the bulk of the Torchwood SUV parked haphazardly on the verge. What was that doing here? He quickly backed into a space further along the road and jogged back to the flats. No one was in the SUV so he headed up the stairs where he met Jack coming down.

"Where have you been!" demanded Jack, anger masking his relief at seeing Ianto.

"Out. Why?"

"I called you. Three times. You didn't answer."

"It's been switched off." Ianto was irritated and pushed past Jack who was blocking his way on the stairs. "What's it to you? I'm on suspension, remember?" He continued up the stairs to his floor.

"Doesn't mean you can ignore me." Jack followed Ianto and stood behind him as he opened the door.

Turning in the doorway, Ianto blocked the entrance to the flat. "I wasn't. I was doing what you told me to do, sir, getting a life!"

"Oh." Jack's anger ebbed away as he realised he was in the wrong and he backed off half a step. He wondered why he felt disappointed that Ianto had a life outside Torchwood but ignored it. "That's good."

"So what did you want me for, sir?"

"We can't find some files and - " Jack stopped when Ianto burst out laughing. "I'm glad you find it so funny."

"You come chasing up here because of some files?" Ianto relaxed his stance and leant against the doorframe, his hands in the pockets of his jeans. "I thought there was an invasion at least."

Jack had the grace to smile at the absurdity of the situation and the picture of the relaxed and smiling Ianto. This was more like the man in the photographs he had found. "It's not just the files. I was worried when you didn't call back."

This sobered Ianto who looked away from his boss's penetrating gaze. While Jack's appearance at the flat was an intrusion and completely over the top, Ianto couldn't help also feeling pleased that Jack cared enough to check up on him. "I'm all right, sir," Ianto said finally, looking back at his visitor.

Voices and the sounds of feet racing up the stairs drew the two men's attention. Ianto was astonished to see Owen and Gwen charging up towards them, weapons in hand. The newcomers' headlong dash slowed as they reached the landing and saw Jack and Ianto standing there.

"False alarm," said Jack breezily.

"You what!" hissed Owen.

Ianto was staring at the three of them open-mouthed. "I don't believe it. You called them in too?"

"Well, you could have been hurt. Needing medical attention." Jack smiled at them all, unwilling to admit to the panic that had seized him when he'd been unable to raise Ianto. "Better safe than sorry."

More footsteps echoed on the stairwell as Toshiko ran up to join them. "Sorry, traffic," she said as she reached the landing. "What's happening?"

"Are you all right, Ianto?" asked Gwen, putting away her Glock.

"Yes, thanks." He smiled at her. "I was at the seaside in Barry."

"Oh isn't that bleeding marvellous!" Owen glowered at Jack and poked him in the chest. "I'm done. I'm going home. And don't bother to call me for anything else tonight. Understand?" With that he headed back down the stairs. "You coming, Gwen?"

"Yeah." With an embarrassed glance round, which only Jack understood, she clattered down the stairs after the doctor. Maybe she and Owen could go for a drink; Rhys need never know.

"So, there's no emergency?" asked Toshiko.

"No. Seems Ianto's been off on a solitary walk along the beach," replied Jack with a smile, assuming a lot.

"I wasn't alone." Ianto kept a straight face and met Jack's enquiring gaze squarely. He had no intention of telling him who he had been with.

The three of them stood for a few moments, none of them quite knowing what to say or do next. Jack cleared his throat and said, "I need to speak to you. Can I come in?"

"I suppose so. Tosh, want a coffee?" He felt happier having her in the flat as well as Jack.

"Oh, please! I've really missed your special brew." She hesitated a moment to look at Jack. "If I won't be in the way, that is."

"Of course not. You only want to talk about files, don't you, sir?"

"That's right."

Ianto turned and went in leaving the others to follow. He crossed the living room and went into the kitchen, not quite sure how he felt about having his colleagues in his home. Perhaps not as bad as he had feared, he decided, filling the coffee machine and switching it on. The flat had become a lonely place over the past few weeks. Reaching for mugs, he glanced back into the living room where Toshiko had removed her jacket – it was hanging neatly by the front door – and sat on the sofa, her shoes kicked off and her legs curled beneath her. Jack, still wearing his heavy greatcoat, was prowling the room peering into every nook and cranny.

"Lost something, sir?" he asked.

"No, just looking," said Jack without stopping his inspection. This could be his only chance to suss out his youngest team member before he decided to bring him back into the Hub. "Don't forget the biscuits. Chocolate."

Toshiko shrugged in sympathy as she met Ianto's gaze. "Can I help?"

"No, you're okay."

He went back to his task, looking out a packet of chocolate digestives and putting them on a plate. Ten minutes later he brought a tray laden with mugs and the biscuits into the living room and put it on the coffee table. Jack was sitting in one of the armchairs, his greatcoat discarded and hanging half on and half off the end of the sofa. Ianto walked round, picked it up and hung it on the peg beside Toshiko's and his own coats.

"Help yourself," he urged before sitting in the other chair, mug in hand.

"This is so good." Toshiko smiled over the rim of the mug, both hands cradling it as if for warmth. "You're looking well."

"Thanks. How are things with you?"

"Much the same." She glanced at the silent and watchful Jack wondering if, after all, she was in his way. "Being worked hard, of course, but you know what that's like."

"Oh yeah." Ianto sipped his coffee, pleased Toshiko was treating him as she had before his suspension. He hoped they would be able to resume their friendship properly. "Are you missing files too?"

Again she glanced at Jack who didn't seem inclined to join the conversation. "A couple. I've been helping Jack with the purchase requisitions and I know you have a file but - "

"We can't find it," interrupted Jack abruptly. "Nor the one on the Grupeekii's last visit. And Owen needs half a dozen. Here," he thrust a scrappy piece of paper towards Ianto, "this lot."

The Welshman took a moment to read the list, in Owen's unmistakable scrawl. He had hoped Jack and the rest of the team would miss him, Ianto, for himself rather than his file-finding abilities but maybe this was better than nothing. At least they had missed him.

"Know where they are?" pressed Jack, leaning forward and taking another biscuit. He felt uncomfortable in the flat which mirrored Ianto so perfectly – neat, clean with everything in its place. It proved yet again how little attention he had paid to the Welshman and how much he had taken for granted.

"I know where they should be, sir." He risked a look at Jack. "They could have been moved in the past few weeks."

"We've dumped files and papers all over the place," admitted Toshiko. "I found correspondence with the Home Office about security in the quarterly budget file." She saw Ianto's horror-stricken expression. "Sorry."

"You saying you can't tell us where these files are?" said Jack.

"Like I said, I only know where they should be. Where they were before … before …" He decided not to complete the sentence and instead looked back at the list of files.

"In that case, you'd better come back to work." Jack drained his coffee and stood up. "Suspension's over. Report to me tomorrow at 09.00." He took another biscuit and put it into his mouth whole, chewing as he went to get his greatcoat.

"Just like that?" Returning to work was exactly what Ianto wanted but this recall seemed too casual. He had expected a formal discussion with Jack when they talked about all that happened and he was lectured on what would happen if he ever betrayed the team again. He needed his suspension to end officially.

"Yeah. Don't be late." Jack was about to open the front door and turned to say, with a grin, "And wear a suit." With that he was out of the flat, slamming the door shut behind him.

Toshiko grinned mischievously at Ianto's expression. "Never expect Jack to do the expected. Thought you'd know that by now."

-ooOoo-

At 08.55 the following day Ianto walked into the Tourist Office. The place smelt musty and dust was visible on all the surfaces; obviously none of the team had been here in the past few weeks. He opened the secret door and entered the tunnel beyond, using the walk and trip down in the lift to quell his nerves. It was one thing for Toshiko to say that the others would accept him back, quite another to actually be here. The lift doors opened and he straightened his tie, took a deep breath and walked up to the cog door which rolled away with a blaring of klaxons and flashing red lights. Talk about announcing his arrival!

Stepping into the Hub proper, Ianto scanned it for changes but didn't see any immediately. The work area was deserted. Glancing up, Ianto checked the Boardroom but that too was empty. His return was turning into an anticlimax.

"Ah, there you are."

Ianto spun round to see Jack coming down the metal steps from the upper level. "Yes, sir. Where is everyone?"

"Let's see. Gwen and Owen are checking a body in Atlantic Wharf and Tosh is downstairs fixing a glitch in one of the servers." Jack stood with arms folded across his chest and ran his gaze down Ianto's suited form. "Looking good, Mr Jones."

"That's harassment, sir."

Jack laughed, a cleansing, natural laugh that showed he was putting the whole Cyberwoman Incident behind them. "Back to work then. Coffee first then get me the Grupeekii file. Quick as you can."

"Yes, sir." He was halfway down the steps on his way to the coffee machine, when Jack spoke again.

"And, Ianto, you have any problems – or problem girlfriends – you talk to me. Understand?"

"Yes, sir. Thank you, sir." It wasn't the formal ending of his suspecnsion that he really wanted but Ianto realised that he would get nothing better.

The rest of the day passed. Ianto was kept busy locating the missing files – all bar one that didn't come to light for a week when he discovered it underneath the blood synthesizer in the medical bay – making coffee, clearing up and catching up on the operation logs. He kept out of the others' way, much as he had always done, and tried not to react to Owen's nasty comments and Gwen's unease around him. The important thing was that he was back at work, that he had a purpose again. In time, he hoped Owen and Gwen would forgive him totally and until then he was prepared to work hard and try to fit in with the team.

That evening, when the others had left, Ianto forced himself to walk down to the basement. He had made the trip so often he didn't need more than the emergency lights and it was in semi-darkness that he pushed open the large double doors. The room was empty. Nothing remained of Lisa except perhaps a lingering trace of Chanel. Trembling, Ianto walked further into the shadowy room remembering where the conversion unit had stood, where he had sat and read to her and seen to all her physical needs. With an effort of will, he circled the room to where he had knelt next to the prone and bloody body of Lisa.

"Ianto."

He looked over to see Jack standing in the doorway. "I … needed to … I needed to put some ghosts to rest," he said quietly.

"As long as that's all it is. Come on, time you were off home."

Jack moved aside and indicated Ianto should leave, closing the doors behind them. They walked along the tunnels and up the stairs in silence. Ianto had settled back reasonably well but Jack was keeping an eye on him; he had been betrayed once because he had underestimated the young man and was not going to let it happen again. One visit to the basement was understandable but any more would be a cause for concern. In the work area, Jack declined the offer of coffee and watched as Ianto powered down his PC and prepared to leave.

"I'll be off then, sir."

"Okay. Goodnight."

"Goodnight."

It was the following day that Jack attended a lecture given by his old friend Estelle Cole and Ianto reported on the unusual weather patterns over Cardiff.

* * *

_And so Ianto is back at work ready to meet the faeries. Thanks for your support and reviews, they are, as always, much appreciated - Jay._


End file.
